Guest Blog: The Psychology Of Where To Go On A First Date

where-to-go-first-date

When it comes to first impressions, there’s nothing quite like making a good one. Psychologists have long known about the powerful influence of priming on human behavior and decision making; which suggests that what we perceive first can highly influence how we perceive subsequent information. Our brains are wired to pick up from the most easy and accessible cues that requires minimal expenditure in terms of the vital brain resources, therefore we latch onto the information presented first!

This has huge implications for dating, relationships and of course the first date! The Psychologists at HaveYourPick.com have hand selected a number of first date locations stemming from the cutting edge findings of science and Psychology, to fuse these exciting insights into practical and useful understandings on where to take her on a first date!

Idea (1) Comedy Club
showroom1

While you aren’t necessarily cracking the jokes at a comedy club, Psychology says it doesn’t matter. Our brains like to create cause effect relationships, however often gets confused and misattributes what it finds in one context and places it onto something else. Put simply, since you are the object of focus throughout the date, and you are present in a humorous environment, the humorous nature of the context becomes shifted onto you – highlighting you as the causal mechanism of her laughter. So well done Mr Funny guy!

Idea (2) The Zoo

If you and your date are animal lovers, the zoo can be a perfect destination! Getting up close and personal to potentially dangerous animals sparks an ancient unconscious reaction which speeds up our heart rate, gives us sweaty palms and prepares us for fight or flight. While you’re thinking how can this be a attraction inducing environment, lets explore the psychology behind it.

While our body gears up for a stressful occasion, we instinctively know that we will not come into danger in the safe haven of a zoo experience. Thus what happens, is that our brains decode the information as excitement rather than life threatening. And through the magic of unconscious misattribution that we discussed earlier, you have created an exciting and rememberable first date experience that will cause her to take to her friends about you and the date, further working in your favor!

Idea (3) Surprise Surprise!

When situations become predictable, the level of enjoyment and pleasure that we draw from it gradually decreases.

Our brains accustom to the predictable nature!

But when you anticipate a pleasurable event or occasion and when things are a little uncertain, the brain releases a pleasure chemical known as dopamine into the brains reward centers! Ironically, the brain releases more dopamine during anticipation than when actually receiving the pleasurable thing itself! Therefore keeping the first date location a secret until you get there can work wonders in causing the brain to release it’s natural pleasure inducing chemicals!

For more on the psychology of first date ideas please visit http://www.haveyourpick.co.uk

jamieAbout the Guest Author: Jamie

Jamie received a BS in Psychology from the University of East Anglia (England) in 2011. Since then his passion has been to investigate how the unconscious mind shapes our decision making and behavior beyond our conscious awareness. In particular, He is interested in how men can utilize the latest psychological findings to improve their dating and relationships and success with women. From how to text to women to how to attract women in nightclubs, psychology has a lot to offer! We at Seriously Maybe appreciate the post and wish you continued success!

10 Responses to Guest Blog: The Psychology Of Where To Go On A First Date

  1. good article, Jamie, does this apply to woman well? it seems as though we live in a society where the men are expected to make the first good impression, what about the women making a good impression on us men. There has been times where women make a bad impression on me and it totally kills the vibe and i end up not wanting to date them in the future. what advice would you give to women out there that thinks it’s up to the man to make the first good impression. whether it’s going out or just a simple conversation…

    thanks

  2. Great question John – I think you’re very right in what you say about society favouring men to make a great first impression, however there’s lots of psychology that suggests why that is.

    Social proof – men are expected (unconsciously or consciously) to make the effort on the first date. We instinctively subscribe to this way of thinking through socialization just like women expect the guy to pick up the cheque on the first date.

    Loss aversion – not making an effort with significantly reduce your chance of success with the woman.

    Evolution: women are much more selective than men when it comes to selecting a partner, therefore the man must prove his worth by making a concerted effort.

    However, my advice to women would be to go into the date with an equal mind frame, and that it’s up to both of you to make the effort. Of course, if the woman makes no effort then she risks not being deemed worthy of a second date. I think as long as there is inequality between men and women, and what they ‘should’ bring to the first date, there will always be this kind of division.

  3. Well, try to ask her favorite places, favorite foods or favorite hanging place. Or try to invent a new place wherein you and your date will enjoy and will never felt boring.

  4. I tell everyone you can’t figure out why somebody doesn’t do something. It’s hard enough to figure out why someone does do something. Thanks for share it.

  5. Comedy club is a good idea, although you might want to avoid sitting in the front row if you’re shy!

  6. Your ideas follows my many times advice: get as far as possible from bars or food places and get to a place that will enhance dialogue. Good creative stuff!

  7. I don’t think above ideas are right. The first date location should be kind of resort like place where two people can get privacy as well as food and drinks to have.

  8. Thnks for sharing this .

  9. Simply ask the girl where she prefers going or what she likes. Don’t know if zoo would be a good option :)

  10. I really don’t think it matters where you go so long as you keep the date short and sweet, thus leaving her wanting more. Don’t ask the girl where she wants to go; be a man and lead her. I actually penned a poem about dating spots and first meetings. You can find it here: http://shanehubbardpoems.wordpress.com/2013/09/18/poem-spaces/