Can Men and Women really be friends?…

Below is a short clip on Steve Harvey’s opinion about men and women being friends…Interesting

20 Responses to Can Men and Women really be friends?…

  1. I kinda believe men and women can be “just friends”. Why only kinda? Because, in my opinion, the environment that allows for a satisfying friendship between the opposite sex looks a lot like the environment that creates satisfying romantic relationships. Therefore, I believe that being friends with the opposite sex is only done successfully when boundaries are applied.

    Boundaries can be natural or contrived. Here’s an example of each.
    Contrived: if one (or both) friends are married/spoken for then of course they are not free to explore the romantic possibilities and they make behavior decisions that prevent romance from blossoming. The ingredients for a love relationship may exist but they use boundaries to prevent it from going down that path. Done properly, sure they can be friends. It doesn’t mean they wouldn’t seek romance if the barriers to romance were to be lifted. I call this type of friend, a friend-in-waiting. I can often spot them as they love to approach my husband and begin the conversation with, “How’s your wife?” – Translation, “Are you still married? Happy?”. I can tell when it’s not genuine concern about me, especially when they don’t know anything about me. I digress…

    Natural: If at least one friend is not attracted to the other, perhaps they have a physical/ behavioral quality that is unattractive to the other (think: He’s not that into you), that usually creates a natural boundary to converting from friendship to romance and helps keep the friendship in the friendship box.

    I suspect Steve doesn’t have women as friends because he’d prefer not to struggle with the boundaries required to respect his marriage while having an opposite sex friends. As a celebrity, I’m guessing most ladies are friends-in-waiting. I also believe he’s had issues of infidelity in a previous marriage see:(http://urbanbellemag.com/2012/11/steve-harvey-says-he-wasnt-a-faithful-man-until-he-met-his-third-wife.html). Considering this, he probably knows his limits of what works for him and what doesn’t.

  2. Of course they can. Many of my best friends are male and I have never done so much as kissed them. I think what people need to concentrate on is keeping the man or woman they have and not worrying about what people say about having opposite sex friends. My partner was jealous of some of my male friends, and I decided it needed to stop. I bought him a book, and I can say that he is a changed man. I found the book on Amazon, http://www.amazon.com/How-Make-Woman-Happy-Guide-ebook/dp/B00ULJLDSS

  3. I’m 40 now, and I’ve preached this long and hard to anyone who would listen that men and women (particularly of the same peer group) -cannot- be platonic friends. It’s too hard to escape the sexual tension, it’s bubbling below the surface at all times. There are exceptions to everything. I think men can get along okay with lesbian women. Where there is no sexual attraction going in one direction, this can greatly relieve the pressure of any weird sexual vibes. I think in the workplace, thru social conditioning, men and women have learned to get along agreeably in order to get the job done. Finally, friendships do occur between men and women of significant age difference due to sexual attraction at that point being non-existent or a non-factor. Besides those caveats, any platonic, seemingly innocent friendship between a man and a woman of similar age is a fraud and a masquerade.

  4. Interesting question but I’d say Yes – men & women can be friends. My bestfriend is a man and we’ve been best friends since we were 6 years old. I agree there’s sexual tension at some stage of the friendship but it’s entirely up to the individual to either let it go or act on it. Fortunately for us, we both are involved with other people so there’s not much of a pressure there. We have although spoken about this topic at some stage of our lives and thought what would it be like if we could have been in a relationship more than just friendship.

    We will never know as we decided not to go there as we both think that if it didn’t work out then there’s a huge possibility that it will also ruin our friendship and that we could not let it happen.

  5. This debate has been going on for centuries and I doubt it will be solved anytime soon. Do women live in disillusionment? Are men just too immature? Thanks for sharing the clip though!

  6. Yes they can really be friends. I’ve had plenty of male friends and we were strictly just friends….nothing more nothing less Just speaking from personal experiences!

  7. Just because Steve Havey shared his opinion about why it’s impossible for men to friends with women without getting involved sexually doesn’t mean it’s a universal norm.

    Let’s keep in mind that every one is living and going about life according to their standards, values and beliefs.

    The question we all should be thinking is not whether it is possible and if it’s right for a male friend to develop attraction and sexual feelings towards a female friend, but what should we do when it happens. Its bound to happen whenever a masculine and a feminine energy are interacting and there is polarity between them. We all want connection and love and sometimes a best friend (female or male ) could have most of those qualities, values or personality traits you seek in a relationship partner. When this happens you will be compelled to respond to that spark of your polar match.

    Most of my friends are males, but I also have a lot of female friends and been friends with some for many years. I remember a situation where I became attracted to one of my female friend, and at the time she wasn’t in a relationship and I wasn’t in a relationship so consciously decided to give up our social friendship and date. We did and it was a deep enriching love experience. It was actually one of the most fulfilling and nurturing relationships I have ever been in.

  8. Honestly, in my opinion I don’t think men and women can be true friends, especially if one of them are attractive. But maybe that’s just me, I’ve never found it work out the way I wanted.

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  10. men & women Can be friends Or not it depend upon the will power of the two individual involved and if sex comes in between then everytime one has to remind the other to the purpose of their relationship.

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  17. Absolutely, unless one party wants more. If both parties feel the other is not quite what they are looking for although a great person it is problematic.

    Boundaries are important when one or both parties are married. Lunches and dinners without the spouse is inappropriate and unnecessary in both cases. Midnight phone calls are not Ok, and neither are trips together. If your spouses friend is not attempting to include you in the friendship, chances are they are really not his or her friend. and are not helping to nurture the mariage, so it is reasonable to encourage your spouse to distance themselves from this friend.

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